Tik Toker

why do i get attached so quickly

when i start missing them but i realize they aren’t blocked on anything . they still have my number . we aren’t mutuals on anything but they could still choose to message me if they wanted to . they probably know how much i miss them . but they don’t care so i just have to pretend i don’t care either

you were the one i wanted most to stay

i haven’t felt like myself lately

i just wanna feel okay

even if we up never talking to each other again you’ll always be a part of me

i miss how interested you were in me

in some other life we are standing side by side and laughing together

am i that easy to forget

“it was bad timing” i told myself . but bad timing happened time and time again . and after all the pain , maybe it wasn’t the timing . maybe we were just two people bad for each other .

i will always love the false image i had of you

i miss going to sleep and waking up to your message

so many messages i wish i could just delete

i’m tired of being tired

try my best but nothing works out

you were the last time i was in love with anyone

recently i’ve been feeling empty or emotionless . i find myself drifting off in the middle of the day almost like i’m watching myself in third person . i keep chasing things and feelings in hopes that it can fill that “empty” void i have but i always end up feeling more empty . i can’t escape my escape . i’m starting to isolate myself from friends and even family , i find myself building walls around me to “protect” myself from getting hurt but i end up building myself a prison and i’m trapped with my own thoughts . i sleep too much or not enough and i’m always tired no matter how much i did sleep . i never live in the moment because part of me is still stuck in the past , replaying scenarios and changing the outcome of them . i feel like simple tasks are now becoming overwhelming like getting out of bed in the morning . it’s not always like this though , i have my good weeks and good days but it always circles back to this dreadful feeling .

seeing you was magic but your favorite act was to disappear

my own expectations are the heaviest weight i have ever carried

we met at the wrong time